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Turns regular quotes into curly quotes, also converts hyphens to dashes using a heuristic and outputs the result as UTF-8, suitable to copy/paste into wordprocessor.
requires: http://daringfireball.net/projects/smartypants/ (which does most of the work)
(I renamed smartypants.pl to smartypants before adding it to my $PATH)
Also requrires PHP with the multibyte module installed (its installed by default with PHP, but the sysadmin on one server I use disabled it... presumadly to increase performance or something).
There are 16 alternatives - vote for the best!
If you can do better, submit your command here.
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