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Sure, it's dirty, but it's quick, it only displays the excuse, and it works.
Almost same output with fewer typing... OP had a great idea : BOFH !!!
The subject in a gpg mail isn't encrypted. For people without imagination this often becomes a drama.
1. Install polygen
sudo apt-get install polygen
2. Download "Bastard Operator From Hell Excuses" dictionary:
cd ~/.icedove/xxxxxxx.default/ && wget http://www.polygen.org/polygen/source/ita/bofh.grm
Kills all the threads from the user provided in the WHERE request.
Can be refined through the SQL request, of course, see http://dev.mysql.com/doc/refman/5.1/en/processlist-table.html for the available columns.
Gets a BOFH excuse from the BOFH excuse server (towel.blinkenlights.nl port 666), and passes it through sed and tr to get rid of telnet connection stuff.